Oh, what do you do . . .

My baby went to first grade last August.

It was a dream come true.  I was kid-free for 7 hours a day.  I planned and finished projects I had dreamed of doing for years.  I dove into to family history work and indexing.  I started playing the piano more and organizing my day.

It was nightmare. I'd jump from errand to project, filling my days but there was no sound in the house, no child calling me to come. I hit rock bottom after the Sandy Hook Elementary shooting. I can't even comprehend what the parents are going through still but my own personal fears had me hugging my 1st grader tighter each night and thanking God that he was in my life each day.

My middle son was unhappy. My husband and I couldn't ever pinpoint if it was just school being boring or a situation with friends or both.  He took it out on his family.

After 10 years, thinking we had it figured out, my husband and I gratefully and eagerly took a parenting class offered by our pediatrician's office.  Our home life drastically improved.

I stare at each day, my mind whirling with all the possible things to accomplish and do, and wish that any of my 3 children could be with me. It's only for a moment.  I wouldn't rob them of the opportunity to grow and experience but my heart aches just a little for more time and more voices clamoring around me. 

The mad rush of after school with homework, practice, friends, dinner and all its noise tests my new parenting skills but brings a smile to my face as I fall into bed.

Summer is coming. A whole lot less will get done and my new parenting skills will be put to the ultimate test as I attempt to teach my children to navigate the day without tearing each other down.  After growing up with 4 brothers, I know in my heart the only true teacher of curbing sibling rivalry is age and maturity. But I won't give up requiring nicer words and tones. I'll remind them that it won't be long and they could be calling their sibling long distance and seeing them once a year.

And now I ask myself, what am I going to do today?

Flaming Gorge, revisited

I loved camping as a kid.  That's what we did for vacations.  There were 6 kids. We went relatively close, remember there was 6 kids and an old Dodge van. You didn't really want to go too far. We'd blast Roger Miller tapes. Wish the air conditioner worked better. Annoy each other.  Had lots of fun.

Favorite camping spot--Mustang Ridge at Flaming Gorge.  You can walk to the swimming hollow from the campground.  They have flushing toilets and showers only near the entrance but every day or two it's nice to escape the closer outhouses for something a little more fancy. My parent's spent their honeymoon there.  My dad had been going there since he was kid.

Fast forward so many years (I'm not telling you exactly how many).  I'm the adult.  I have 3 kids. Our first real family vacation, I sort of drag my husband there but with my parents in tow.  It was a blast. My husband adored it.  Next year, my husband takes us again but we take his parents to show them how awesome it is.

Fast forward a few more years.  My sister is going to be in town during the summer. She wants to relive those fun camping memories.  So, we plan a trip.  We are going back together. Everyone is invited. Initially, all 6 of my siblings and parents are in.  However, as time gets closer, my sister and I end up sans husbands.  My 2 married brothers are sans wives and small babies.  My college brother can't get away from work. So, with regret, we headed out still planning on fun.  Me driving a truck and hauling a trailer for the first time.

A few tips you more experienced moms will know.  Grandpa/Dad is awesome with kids but not your husband.  Uncles/Brothers are awesome with kids but not your husband.  You can have a great time and love the memories but your husband will still not be there.

I went to see the smiles on my kids faces with their cousins that live far away.  I went to hang out with my sister. We spent 16 1/2 years together, couldn't escape each other, and now we can only see each other around once a year. I went to give my kids memories that I had growing up--visiting Dinosaur National Monument, rafting down the Green River, seeing the Milky Way in the sky around the campfire, swimming in the lake, taking the Dam tour with all its accompanied phrases.

So, while I wouldn't trade this

Dinosaur Monument

or this

Girls having fun

or this

Ultimate pioneer, pulling handcart with baby in arms

or this

He loved his cousin being so gentle and attentive, this photo really highlights the family resemblance

for anything.

I'm not ever going camping without this again. 

My husband outdoors with son

Not ever.

 It took me 2 weeks to recover from my "vacation", physically and emotionally. Extended family is awesome, I never would have survived that vacation without them. But, I now know that without my personal hero/husband, no experience will capture the full joy of family vacations as I knew them from childhood.  So I can't wait for the next time to visit Flaming Gorge, with my husband driving the trailer, creating memories for my kids and recapturing the magic of family camping trips because my whole family will be present.

Reviewing 2012

So, it's been awhile.

And now that the new year is started and I'm getting back into a schedule, I plan on posting a little more often. My next couple should be simple as I review some of my favorite 2012 moments.

From August 2012, comes my favorite quote.  It was shouted at me during a family vacation at Flaming Gorge with extended family.  We were at Mustang Ridge (Shepherd Family favorite campground right near the swimming hollow).  Breakfast was finishing and we were planning the day.  I informed my daughter I needed a brush and hair things to get her ready for the day.

"MOM!  WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE ME LOOK SO FREAKING NICE!"


Same day, with her looking so "freaking nice"

It was classic.  Aunts, uncles, grandparents all snickered.  I had to try to hide mine from her.  I did, however, pull out my phone and type this quote in a memo preserving it for posterity.

So, one day soon, when I'm telling her teenage self that she needs to get out of the bathroom, I can remind her that it wasn't so long ago that she didn't care how "freaking nice" she looked.

Catching

You know those annoying habits your kids pick up that you are constantly trying to get them to stop. You know--nose picking, biting nails, chewing on their shirt and throwing everything in the air and catching it.  As a mom, I can see the long term consequences that completely escape their notice. You pick your nose, it can bleed and the skin gets red and irritated. You chew your nails, the nails get weak and tear.  You chew your shirt, the shirt collar will stretch and look funny.  I thought I knew the consequence for throwing and catching--you'll break something.  I now have a new one. You'll get a staple in your finger.




It never even dawned on me to tell my son to not throw a stapler when I asked him to get it for me.  It didn't dawn on me that my sports-inclined, agile son who likes to test his skills at all time would even toss it, watch it spin in the air and then catch it.  I was busy. It was time to leave for soccer practice, left-overs needed to be in the fridge because right after soccer was pack meeting.

I heard a brief shout.  No crying or screaming.  Just the loud, "MOOOOOMMMMM." 

Exasperated, my response was short as I shoved left-over pizza in the fridge.  "What."

He did a high pitched whine again, coming into the kitchen.  "MOOOOOMMMM. Look."

And there you have it, the long term consequence for throwing an ordinary household object in the air.  He said it didn't hurt. It just felt like a pinch and he only noticed it when he came to the kitchen.  It had gone into the pointer finger on his right hand.  I'd been reamed out by a nurse when he was 2 for pulling a nail out of his palm.  You're supposed to let a medical professional assess the foreign object to see if it hit bone or other important areas.  Still, I probably would have just pulled it out and put on a bandaid except that I could see the staple on the other side of his finger just under the nail.  That freaked me out. If it wasn't going to come easily, the medical professional could do it.

I called my blessedly close mother-in-law and left the other two children with her. I called the doctor's office while on the road and my husband met us there.  A lot of paper jokes, a quick yank, some tears and a prescription for augmentin and we were out of the doctor's office and ready to move on.  Even though his finger hurt for a couple of days, he did get a kick out of showing people the picture. And he got to add the doctor's collection of things he's pulled out of kids.  My son was most surprised by the rather large crayon that came out of a nose and 3 earring backs from girls putting them on too tight and it slips under the skin on the back.  That one surprised me too.

So, the next time you are trying to stop your boys from throwing and catching things in the house, you can always tell them that they could end up with a staple in a finger.

So a whole summer flew by and my children are well into the next school year.  I'm busy trying to catch up.  I heard about this phenomenon but thought it was but a myth when your mired in toddler years. It goes fast. When you can sleep through the night and never buy diapers, time suddenly leaps by. There is not one thing you can do to stop it.

 

Take this handsome boy for instance.  I can't stop the fact that his birthday came. He's 1 year older. He's taller, although he's not managed to edge his sister out in height yet but it's a close race. I can't stop the fact that he looks like a photo model and every photo session the photographers love how easy he is to pose and how quickly they get a great shot.

He loves all things outdoors, willing to try any sport and right now into cross country.  He LOVES his new bike and roller blades. As soon as the homework is done, he's out of the house.

He's extremely independent and careful about his appearance. Girls out there, I do have big stick and I'm not afraid to use it, especially those 3rd grade girls at Oquirrh Elementary who seem intent on chasing him right now. I know he's awesome but you're not allowed near him until 16 and even then you'll have to get by me to be part of his group dates.

For just a couple of more blinks, he's still my little boy. I love him just the way he is.

In Recognition

Happy Birthday!

The school year ends with recognition and awards.  For the 4th year running, my daughter has gone above and beyond. She has received the Mountain Man Award that requires extra goals and shows outstanding academics and citizenship.  She received the National Award for the physical fitness program.  She just missed Presidential level by being less than a minute over the time allowed for girls when running the mile.

After the schoolwide recognitions, I joined her class for a special recorder recital. I'm sure you all remember that lovely instrument from your own 4th grade experience.  She received additional awards for the girl who read the most minutes this year, 5,822 minutes that were recorded. She actually reads more than that (which is why she received her heart's desire of a kindle for her birthday).  She also received an award for the stretchiest girl. For the fitness testing, they have to pass a sit and reach. You sit and reach as far past your toes as you can go.  She can reach 39 centimeters.



And as she spends her very last hours as a 4th grader, she celebrates her birthday.  Today, we all recognize that she is 10 years old. As her body starts to curve, her dad has declared that mumu's are a lovely fashion choice. And while her dad and I batton down the hatches to weather the drama storm, we marvel at how kind she can be, how thoughtful of others (as long as they are not her brothers) and how brillant she is.

 We recognize how lovely, how creative, how smart, how kind,

 how perfectionist, how fashionista and how wonderful she really is.

Late 10

My family has recently discovered the kids bowl free summer program. I'd seen the flyer last year but never paid it much mind. This year with impending summer looming and activities required to keep kid #1 and kid #2 from constant fighting, I thought why not.  Hey, I can even use that semester of bowling I took in college for my generals physical education credit.

My youngest loves bowling. Go ahead, ask me how often he has played the Wii since May 15th when the program started.  He gets up, he does his chores, he reads and ask, "Can we go bowling now?"  He knows we have to bowl in the morning before Kindergarten because there is too much going on after school. It's like Christmas every morning, waking with eager anticipation.

Now we are becoming bowling aficionados. We are far from any level of expert but we're picking up the basics and a little more.  I have finally found the right weight ball works for me.  Yes, I have even purchased bowling shoes.  They're are pretty styling if I do say so myself.

My little bowler is all about the game.  The smallest ball weighs 6 lbs and initially that seemed too heavy.  Now that he has the hang of it, he's convinced that the 8 lbs gives him more strikes.  That's right he gets strikes as of last week.  After a month of playing, rolling, sometimes dropping the ball, he gets the late 10.  The ball rolls down and starts a chain reaction and that last pin or 2 will wobble and with more frequency now, fall all the way down.

Here is a sample of my morning fun.

Bowling Video

His high the first week was 90. Then his next high score was 95. Then 98.  Then he got his first strike. Now he can get at least 1 strike a game.  His real triumph--114.  He had the front counter print that game for his records.

So instead of virtual bowling on the Wii, we're doing the real thing.  It should be very interesting when kid #1 and kid #2 are finally out of school on Friday and we can all be bowling nerds together. We can be the late 10 club because that is the only way we are getting strikes, tilting our heads the side as we watch the last pin wobble and fall.