Summer Lesson #4

Bribery does not always work.

With a week left of school this last June, I started dreading the fact that two of my children would now spend more of the day together instead of in different classrooms. My 9 year old and 7 year old waste no opportunity to tease, tattle, pick on and generally annoy each other.

So, I came up with a reward system. Each day that no major fighting occurred, I would mark a star on the calendar. When there were 5 stars, we could all choose a $1 movie and go.

So how many times did we make it to the $1 movie theater. That's right, not once.

I did however come up with many clever new consequences. If you say an unkind thing, you can make that person's bed the next morning to do something nice to compensate for the not nice. Physical fighting will not be tolerated in any form and you will be grounded (I had to do this twice). If I have to listen to potty language, you can clean the toilet. Potty language disappeared entirely.

So, how did I survive the summer? Projects, friends and Grandma's. I came up with projects that took us out of the house. I drove them to friend's house to keep them apart. Most importantly, the Grandma's saved us all.

On both sides of the family, they took time to give each child days on their own with just Grandma. My children came home happier with awesome stories and projects they did. Each one felt valued individually and not in relation to their siblings which is the major reason they pick at each other. They want to be noticed above, around, or over their siblings. Mom loves them all but each day they clamor for more proof or fight to the death to get just a little more attention, even the negative kind.

So here's to the Grandma's--summer wouldn't have been the same without them.