Summer Lesson #6

The end.

I love the end--the end of the story, the wrap-up, the completion of one thing to go on to something new.


I love the end of summer. The last minute hikes in the canyons to see everything before the colors start changing. It finally begins to drop in temperature. My kids fidget in anticipation, excited to wear new clothes bought at the last possible moment--a little big-- in hopes that they will last the school year. My kids and I get a routine back, myself a slave to school bells just as much as when I was in school.

Now, there are NEW stories to read. Science projects to explore. Exciting things to tell each day around the dinner table. Friends seen each day and new ones made. Most importantly, a chance to learn new things and grow.

A chance to read, practice math and spend a couple hours with
other kids learning, instead of all by himself with just mom for company.


A chance to be a great friend, find out about experiments that will drive Mom
crazy as each day something new can be tried, to become more responsible
and crazy smart.


A chance to hone the steel trap of his memory, absorb new facts,
test his physical strength and continue to excel in anything
he desires.

The beginning of new school year is filled with possibilities.

Summer Lesson #5

I love to create or remake.

We had the opportunity to get a locking cabinet. It had been my Great Grandpa's gun cabinet. It had been in my parent's room for over 20 years. My mother was remodeling and since my father only had one shotgun left, they weren't keeping the cabinet.

My husband wanted it. We have few more guns and he was more than happy to keep my father's shotgun safe. However, the front panel was clear glass and the size of the cabinet made it tricky to place in the house. There was only one room it would fit in--my living room.

Despite my husband's desire to be NRA and proud of his guns, I do not decorate my living room to Guns and Ammo taste. So, it was time to be inventive.

For years, my mother had wanted to give the cabinet the stained glass effect. You can paint the glass with lead lines and special paint and TADAAA! You have a beautiful decorated cabinet that women would be willing to display. So, we moved the cabinet to the garage and went to work.

A couple of hours were spent searching and drawing the design. It cost me about $30 in Gallery Glass paint. My mother and I spent 3 days painting.
















The result was perfect. My husband likes it so much, he is willing to go the extra mile and install cabinet lighting to glow from the inside and highlight the glass.

I love looking at and knowing that I helped create it's final look. It gave me the confidence to tackle my next project. I found a functioning piano for $75. The piano cabinet is very sad. Someone cut the piano legs to clear a corner and then tried to glue them back in. It's dented and dinged and pieces were not fitting nicely. So, with my husband's extraordinary carpentry skills, I'm restoring a 1920's piano. I'll share my new project when I've completed it.

Summer Lesson #4

Bribery does not always work.

With a week left of school this last June, I started dreading the fact that two of my children would now spend more of the day together instead of in different classrooms. My 9 year old and 7 year old waste no opportunity to tease, tattle, pick on and generally annoy each other.

So, I came up with a reward system. Each day that no major fighting occurred, I would mark a star on the calendar. When there were 5 stars, we could all choose a $1 movie and go.

So how many times did we make it to the $1 movie theater. That's right, not once.

I did however come up with many clever new consequences. If you say an unkind thing, you can make that person's bed the next morning to do something nice to compensate for the not nice. Physical fighting will not be tolerated in any form and you will be grounded (I had to do this twice). If I have to listen to potty language, you can clean the toilet. Potty language disappeared entirely.

So, how did I survive the summer? Projects, friends and Grandma's. I came up with projects that took us out of the house. I drove them to friend's house to keep them apart. Most importantly, the Grandma's saved us all.

On both sides of the family, they took time to give each child days on their own with just Grandma. My children came home happier with awesome stories and projects they did. Each one felt valued individually and not in relation to their siblings which is the major reason they pick at each other. They want to be noticed above, around, or over their siblings. Mom loves them all but each day they clamor for more proof or fight to the death to get just a little more attention, even the negative kind.

So here's to the Grandma's--summer wouldn't have been the same without them.

Summer Lesson #3

Besides the failure to lose weight, trek was hard physically and emotionally. While I'll never come away with my husband's enthusiasm for it (it was his 2nd time to trek like a pioneer), I did value the experience. When an experience touches you and brings new appreciation, it can also make you wordy. If you're willing to bear with me, I'll share what things I learned.

One of the first things my husband and I admired was the young people's help of each other. 14 to 18 year old kids are not always known for their selflessness or sibling camaraderie. When the going got tough, they banded tighter together. This was especially true of direct siblings. One brother got out in the pouring rain to help his sister's tent which was leaking. Brothers watched out for brothers and in the evenings sat close together. Coming from our stage in life, where are children are non-stop fighting with each other and will do anything to pick on each other, we greatly admired the siblings (and the parents who taught them) for their ability to willingly help each other, to offer encouragement and be there if they were needed.

Attitude can make or break the day. You cannot always choose what will happen to you, but you can choose how you'll respond. By the third day, I struggled and managed to find the giddy happy. I was almost done. It was mostly downhill and by flying (I put my arms out like a little girl for airplane wings and let gravity propel me down) I could laugh and be silly and encourage the girls around me to do the same. I could sing "Popcorn popping" and jump each time we said the word pop. I could just have fun. An infectious attitude can lift those around you. On the reverse, if you choose to say it's too hard and think it's the worst thing ever, you will fulfill your own prophecy. I'm certain that one of the youth in our group was told by parents that it would be worth it and encouraged (or made) to come. The youth set out to prove parents wrong. After the first hill, all was lost and the youth rode in the medical truck for the next 2 days. The last day, the truck was emptied of all persons and my husband had to encourage, cajole and finally drag the youth down the hill. They were the last to reach buses. I listened to the youth go on and on during the evening fireside. The rest of us shared stories of humor, fun, what we learned and the youth sat 2 feet from me and complained about every aspect of the trek from food, people, shoes, tents, etc. Everything was wrong. I felt sorry for the youth. I was exhausted and sunburned with a few blisters but my husband was beside me, some wonderful youth were beside me and I felt a new respect for my ancestors and commitment to live my faith as strong as they did. I'll not have their physical challenges but I can face the emotional ones with courage like theirs. I had a wonderful experience that tested me and made me stronger and the youth just had a hard walk. It was all in the attitude.

The most important aspect of the trek is that it gave me a profound respect for family--my spouse, my kids, my parents, my siblings and my ancestors. My husband asked me on the second day if I thought we should do a trek with our kids. I almost cried. He was thinking of this wonderful opportunity to teach them and I was thinking of ancestors sobbing inside as they had little food to give their children and no way to carry them but watch them struggle and walk to keep up and even leaving some in graves along the trail. As a mother, my heart breaks even thinking of what it must have been like.

During one part of the trek, they pull the men away for the women's pull. They leave the women at the bottom of the hill to pull the handcarts by themselves. We watched as they walked up the hill. It's meant to foster in youth how important men and women are for each other. It helps the young girls know they can do hard things and appreciate what men can offer not only for physical needs but spiritual ones. It's just as hard for the men who are use to helping and forced to watch as we struggled. While the boys try to be stoic, my husband admitted that it was just as wrenching the second time and he talked to the boys about appreciation of women and how important we are.

I'd grown up hearing about my pioneer ancestors. Moses Wade and Edward Wade joined the Mormon Battalion and left mother and sister to cross the plains and hopefully meet up in the West. Sarah, the mother, died in Winter Quarters leaving Minerva alone. I told myself as I tried to pull the handcart up the hill that Sarah would have given anything to have gone on with her daughter if she had lived and Minerva didn't stop. She met up with brother and father later. I could do that. But what really kept me going, besides new found appreciation and respect for my ancestors, was that my husband was at the top of the hill. I NEEDED him. Nothing physical or emotional was going to stop me from reaching him. Because of covenants made, nothing will ever part us. If some nasty turn in our lives parts us physically by death, I will stay my course in faith because I want to be with him forever. I want to be with my children forever. I want to live in love forever with my Savior and Father in Heaven.

The precious covenant to be sealed for time and all eternity is why my ancestors walked 1300 miles with every ounce of strength they had to give. They wanted their family forever and would sacrifice anything to make it possible. That one walk up the hill with only women beside me taught me a more profound and humble appreciation for the promises offered by the gospel. It's why the pioneers did everything they did and it's why we as latter-day saints do what we do.

Summer Lesson #2

Big 3 day treks covering 24 miles do not mean that I lost any weight. AT ALL.

I spent all of June walking 3 miles, then 4 miles and finishing the last week before a Pioneer trek walking 7 miles a day. From Thursday July 7th til Saturday July 9th, I walked like a pioneer with a handcart and a bunch of wonderful youth. We covered about 10 miles the first day, 8 miles the second and about 6 miles the last day. I pulled a handcart up a hill with just women on the cart and at one point only 1 girl pushing behind. I was SERIOUSLY active compared to the previous months before I quit working where I spent 8 hours chained to a computer and chair.

What gives?

Okay, I'm over 30 and becoming active is not enough to cut it anymore. 2 years previously I just started walking 3 miles a day and lost 10 pounds. It sucks. It means that a strict regulation of my diet is in order with the exercise. Getting older sucks.

P.S. my sweet husband had to tighten his belt each morning of trek. Yes, he lost weight just on the 3 days, no prep training before.

Summer Lesson #1

With the start of summer and 3 children to keep happy, I fell off the computer radar. It didn't help that our computer bit the dust (quite literally-the power supply failed and when trying to repair it, the hard drive cable was damaged). Going through computer withdrawals, my father graciously offered a viable computer until we can afford the replacement desired (1.5 terabyte hard drive memory with at least 6 gig running ram, preferably 8). So, with an older borrowed computer and no time with children and projects and treks and visiting and brothers coming home after 2 years and all those other things in life, time slipped away.

I'd like to share some important lessons from my summer. The first one is the most recent and by far the cutest.

The Birds and the Bees (as told by 5 year old)

On an outing with my husband and just my 5 year old in tow, my littlest announced he knew where babies come from.

Being naturally curious as to the information--despite 3 children and experience that he will always think his parents aren't capable of except the 3 times necessary for his sister, brother and himself--my husband and I looked at each other and innocently asked, "Where do babies come from?"

"There is special part inside a boy and a special part inside a girl. When they get together, it makes a baby," said my 5 year old.

"How do they get together?" I asked to ascertain exactly how well informed he was.

"They kiss."

"Every time you kiss someone, you'll get a baby?" my husband asked.

"No. It's a special kiss," he wisely informed us. "And it doesn't always work. Sometimes, you have to kiss 1, 2 or even 3 times."

That's good information. So good, we have shared it with all our family, much to the chagrin of our 5 year old. We ask him to tell his aunts and uncles and grandparents. It's such a beautifully sweet and simple way to look at it.

He gets embarrassed now. Tells us that we know the answer. We had to persuade him to repeat it to his Aunt Ashley. It only worked because she doesn't have any kids yet and we had to promise to not to laugh.

So, now you know where babies come from.

Parental Plea

Many of you no longer have to think about the one thing that can make my blood pressure rise every morning around 8 am and 3:25 each afternoon in inclement weather. Yes, my kids are still in school, year around school does not dismiss for summer for tracks B, C, and D until July 1st.

I do know that all of you may experience my stressor at some point unless your kids are bused. Any parent with a child within walking distance to the school knows exactly what I am talking about--vehicle drop off at an elementary.

It's down right scary at the worst times, aka winter ice and snow. It's a game of nerves the rest of the time. There are vehicles pulling at the curb in illegal directions, pulling next to red curbs, going out entrances, turning left where a signs clearly designate no left turns. There are cars on both sides of the street in front of the school and crosswalk, making maneuvering tricky as they pull in and out. Plus, add the constant fear that some small child may fall or dart out.

I could continue to list the horrors but here's my main point. The next time you go to drop off your child, please consider a couple of points.

1. We are all doing the exact same thing. We all don't want to be there. We are making sure our children get back and forth to school safely. So, that extra 2 minutes you might save by squeezing next to the curb and a somewhat awkward angle, so you don't have to follow the school drop off zone, makes it harder for the rest of us to get by safely. Every time you pull up next to the red curb and make the crossing guard difficult to see, you are endangering all of our children. The red curb is there for a reason. The entrance sign and exit sign are meant to keep the flow going one way to keep our kids safe, not suggestions. Every time you make an exception to let your kid out, you slow down the rest of us and let everyone else know that "You are more important" than all the rest of us doing the exact same thing.

2. Schools make traffic plans for a reason. Very smart people review the plans to try to insure the maximum safety and flow. Does this mean it is as fast and convenient as each person needs? No, of course not. But taking extra time and actually reading the suggested drop off the schools provide each year can make all of our kids more safe. It does mean that you might be waiting extra time and it might take longer. I personally prefer to take the longer ways to follow the rules to show my kids how to be safe. If they are tardy, I don't blame it on traffic. I blame it on my own families inability to leave at the appropriate time.

3. Our kids are watching. My kids can point out more traffic violations in elementary school than I ever paid attention to as a kid. I make them follow the rules set by the school and use crosswalks, even if it means added extra time to walking home or doubling back. Kids are not dumb. As adults, if we constantly make exceptions, they will see that it can be done and you can't be there every second to guarantee the exception they make is a low risk or high one.

PLEASE, if you just stop to consider every other car holds a tiny person just like yours, I think that common courtesy and patience would guarantee us all a safer experience. It may not be fast, but it will be safe.

p.s. this soapbox I stood on for this post has been building since 2007. I'm sure it made me more preachy than needed. But please just sift through the diatribe and realize we all need courtesy and patience.